It’s Easy for Me to Build Positive and Profitable Relationships with Individuals.
Communication – the human connection – is the key to personal and career success. ~ Paul J. Meyer
A Turkish Proverb asserts that, “No road is long with good company.” I totally embrace that mantra. Positive and profitable relationships speak to persons living and working harmoniously together. This ensures enhancing the reality of others and ourselves. My multidimensional communication and interpersonal skills as a retired educator facilitated the honing of my penchant for creating and sustaining affirmative relationships. Impregnable building blocks for these relationships were my empathetic response to persons; my highly emulative work ethic; and my magnetic personality and impeccable decorum.
“Empathy is seeing with the eyes, listening with the ears, and feeling with the heart of another.“
Being able to acknowledge individuals empathetically was one of my chief skills in developing connections. Extreme challenges dogged me from childhood but I had always had spiritual and professional mentors who motivated me on to extreme success. Additionally, I am gifted in remembering names and identifying with persons of all age groups. Consequently, I can effortlessly enter other people’s skin and walk around in it – understanding their issues and struggles; and offering healing suggestions.
Be Ready to Lend a Cushion
A few successful buffers to them were: “This too shall pass.”; “Just look on the bright side…” and “let’s look at the glass as half-full instead of half-empty”. I was a comforter to the grieving and a calmer to the distressed, so my telephone was a late-night hotline. Consequently, I became a believable icon by “seeing with the eyes of another, listening with the ears of another, and feeling with the heart of another.” (Alfred Adler). My peers and superiors also found me credible because they had observed and experienced my highly exemplary diligence at the workplace.
Work Ethic is an Important Choice
I totally agree with Martin Luther king Jr. that “If a man [or woman] is called to be a street sweeper, he [she] should sweep streets even as a Michelangelo painted, or Beethoven composed music or Shakespeare wrote poetry. He [she] should sweep streets so well that all the hosts of heaven and earth will pause to say, ‘Here lived a great street sweeper who did his [her] job well.’” This stance, as well as my personal culture, made me give my best in social and work situations. Hence, I agree with Mike Rowe that, “Work ethic is important because, unlike intelligence, athleticism, charisma, or any other natural attribute, it’s a choice.” I have been a visible, tried, and tested model of work ethic. My mantra is, “Never say anything is above your pay grade for you are only limiting yourself. … You should be bold; go above and beyond in all you do; for the right eye will see you at the right time.” For example, after my retirement from the government service I was employed at a private university. After three years the Management recommended me to be the Acting Chair of my Department for one semester because they considered me an excellent lecturer with strong skills sets for such a position. Subsequently, I served in that capacity for two consecutive years. When I re-retired, I was invited back to the same position and at another time to teach; I respectfully declined the offers. Added to my esteemed work attitude, my magnetic personality and impeccable decorum made me an asset to the workplace.
“Nothing can stop the man [woman] with the right mental attitude from achieving his [her] goal… “
A third essential ingredient that I use to forge my coveted bond among peers is the magnetic phenomenon of mine that constrains others to like my company. Being wisely enthusiastic and always polite, I make time to bond with colleagues. I exude the essential, intrinsic characteristic of joyfulness, despite any circumstances. Billy /Graham spoke for me when he asserted, “Joy cannot be pursued. It comes from within. It is a state of being. It does not depend on circumstances, but triumphs over circumstances. It produces a gentleness of spirit and a magnetic personality.” When my daughter died twenty-seven years ago, a student of mine commended me on my strength to return to work after compassionate leave, “as if nothing had happened”. I let her into the secret of my resilience – “The joy of the Lord is my strength.” (Nehemiah 8:10). In spite of my broken heart, my mind kept me in the place of professional administration. I still mentored many students who needed to draw strength from me and I from them. Also, my small acts of kindness captured people’s hearts. My colleagues and students, my church brothers and sisters, and others of my community members knew that they could continue to share a more deeply healthy relationship with me. When people were attracted to my magnetic personality they also benefited from my positive mental attitude. They learned by interacting with me that, as Thomas Jefferson declares, “Nothing can stop the man [woman] with the right mental attitude from achieving his [her] goal; nothing on earth can help the man [woman] with the wrong mental attitude.” Amazingly, I have past colleagues and students of decades ago in the Diaspora consulting with me on academic and sociocultural challenges because they recall their benefit from their association with me. Happily, I can dialogue with them on current formal and informal global affairs. This is miraculous in my senior years, but, as Patricia Neale encourages, “A strong positive mental attitude will create more miracles than any wonder drug.”
It is with confidence that I share with you my invaluable relationship-building attributes. Demonstrating of a selfless, considerate attitude towards others; comporting myself professionally, and possessing a compelling persona are priceless. We do well to remember that “People are lonely because they build walls instead of bridges.” So, tear down walls of solitude. Fortify your bridges towards positive, lifelong relationships that will ensure a gratifying journey.
Photo Credit to: Build Bridges (Jonathan Best)